Bad or Worse

Writer’s note: This week’s post is being presented in all my blogs as I feel that the information is important enough to be told to all audiences.

All right class.

This week’s word is bad.

It is such a simple 3 letter word.

However its meaning is quite vast.

It could mean defective. It could mean evil. It could mean awful. It could mean any number of things.

Back in the 1980’s Michael Jackson sang about “being bad”.

Back then, Jessica Rabbit stated that “she wasn’t bad, she was drawn that way”.

Last weekend on Facebook, a friend of mine stated that they thought they were a “bad person” because they had no father figure in her life and she was going to spend Father’s Day with her daughter.

To me, this is certainly not the making of a “bad person”, but to some people they like to jump to conclusions with little or no evidence. I will get back to that in a bit.

But first, let me rewind time back to last Wednesday, June 11. That day everything seemed normal as I had just put my weekly blog posts online and was done for the day. I decided to do my normal checking in on my ex Tanya on Facebook as I normally do. Granted I had never friended her nor did really ever intend to, but I am still curious about her post-wedding life. For those who read my open letter to her a couple of weeks ago would realize that she still holds a special place with me despite being married to someone else. There seemed to be nothing new on her page or her husband’s, as I regularly checked his too after they got engaged.

So I closed down and called it a day.

Then came Thursday June 12 and well let’s just say something was very wrong.

My first thing that I normally do is check my Twitter account. I usually check to see if I have any new followers or lost any old ones. I had noticed that a couple of people that I had followed seemed to have disappeared.

So just for the heck of it, I checked Tanya's profile and noticed that she had 1 less followers. Granted, she has never tweeted anything so following her may seem counterproductive. When I checked her list of followers, I noticed that I (yes, me) was no longer a follower of hers.

I had wondered what happened.

So I decided to try and re-follow her.

Apparently that was NOT going to happen as she appeared to have blocked me on Twitter. I, then decided to check her husband’s account as well. Even though I never followed him, I was blocked there as well when I tried to follow him.

Ok, this is not good. Not good at all.

So then I decided to go to my Facebook account.

I did a search on her and her page did not come up. I tried typing in the URL that would lead directly to her page and got a “page not found” message. I then repeated the same thing with her husband and received the same result.

At this point, I decided to log into my alternative Facebook account where I am not under my name, and low and behold BOTH of their Facebook accounts were there in all their glory.

So now it was quite apparent.

I was blocked not only by her, but by her husband as well, somebody who has never met me, seen me, or know anything about me at all.

So here I was blocked on both Facebook and Twitter by both of them with no real justification.

At this point, I was shocked and wrote a quick post on Facebook stating that feeling.

Before I get into the response to that, let me just say that I really don’t know what made Tanya to block me. The only thing I would think is that somehow she might have gotten wind of my open letter and somehow might have been offended or angered by it. While I don’t believe that I said anything offensive, she decided that it was best to slam the door on me on as much social media as possible. To add her husband to this blocking made me think that she must be angrier at me for reasons unknown to me. In some ways, I really wish I could turn back the clock and apologize to her for everything that went wrong even though it wasn’t totally my fault.

Now for the response on Facebook I received.

First I am going to call this female responder Janie as to protect her identity.

Janie and I had gone to high school together and really were never that close, however like many others from high school she friended me on Facebook about a year or so ago.

Janie usually spoke her mind and while sometimes mean-spirited, she was rarely ever offensive. That was until this most current posting, which did bother me somewhat.

While her remarks are only 5 lines long, they speak volumes on feelings that really should not exist at all. In one recent message to me, she stated that she “was not my enemy”. I will leave it up to you, dear readers to decide the fate of that statement.

So here we go:

Her first sentence is “I’m sorry to know how depressed you are”. I see nothing wrong with that statement at all.

Sentence 2 is “No one deserves to feel that way”. So far nothing wrong with that statement either.

Sentence 3 is “I’m sure you are a bad person.” Just as the train was rolling smoothly down the tracks we now have this huge derailment. Honestly, where does this sentence follow the first 2 especially when she said just a few weeks earlier that she was “not my enemy”? This sounds like a HUGE contradiction to me. What does she mean by a bad person? Maybe the next sentence might give us a clue.

Sentence 4 is “After just having read some of your last blogs, I think your view of the world is rather narrow.” Ok, you have read only SOME of my blogs and you think I am a bad person because of it? Of course, Janie doesn’t say which blogs she finds me narrow-minded on, therefore her theory falls flat with zero proof.

Sentence 5 is “Have you had a thorough medical check up?” Now unless Janie has a medical degree, this statement is way out of place and certainly uncalled for. However, let me set the record straight, mentally I am absolutely fine, physically walking and standing is an issue and has been since before I lost my job over 5 years ago. Beyond that nothing about my health should even be discussed.

Sentence 6 is “Are you (sic) parents aware of how you’re feeling?” Is she serious? I am well over 21 and this just goes beyond absurd. Again this statement holds no value as Janie doesn’t hold a medical degree so it is not her place to make type of diagnosis.

Finally, sentence 7 is “I believe there are ways to hear (sic) yourself so that you can feel better.” What does this even mean? It makes no sense whatsoever.

Overall, I was quite offended by Janie’s posting. However, I decided not to either unfriend or block her as I feel that would really be the wrong thing to do. I feel that I have a lot to say that would benefit her as would fellow readers. Unfortunately, none of the sentences that Janie stated followed any of the others. No proof of any problems were given, which presented a non-existent case on her behalf.

It is ironic that some of the same things that Janie brought up were some of the same conversations that I used to have with Tanya during her employment with me. However, in Tanya's case, she talked more of her own problems and how we had similar problems and how we could solve our problems together.

Yet, in the end, Tanya ended up blocking me from her existence and turned her back on me. Hopefully, Janie doesn’t end up the same way. I think she is smarter than that.